论文部分内容阅读
笔者有幸参加了2017年6月浙江高考的英语阅卷工作,并且采访了阅卷组部分老师,因而了解了他们对本次英语应用文写作的阅卷体会,下面采撷一些观点供大家参考:
1.应用文以写对为首要任务,不要运用太过花哨的语言表达,应以自然舒服为主。
2.写应用文首先要切题,要点清晰,无关信息不要拓展;其次,要严格把控字数,字数太多反而扣分;再次,重视语言基本功,比如,先说地点再说时间,时间地点按由小到大的顺序,而这些常识性的知识在考场作文上却大量出错。
3.考生应熟悉各种体裁应用文的首尾格式,文本正文部分要在写清要点的基础上争取用上一些原汁原味的词汇和短语来博取阅卷老师的印象分。
4.卷面整洁、字迹漂亮非常重要,一篇作文书写和字迹好坏可相差2-3分,两篇就是4-6分,学生练好字,收益很大。
反思阅卷老师的现场感受,对我们进一步认清应用文写作的训练方向,强化应用文写作的备考措施,有着积极的指导作用。
[一、应用文写作的应试定位]
浙江新高考英语的应用文写作应该定位为小作文,需要“短平快”,不能“小题大做”而耗时过多。结合应用文的交际文体特点,应在12-15分钟内完成地道、得体、简约、清晰的小作文。切忌过于追求复杂句式和华丽词汇。
本次高考的邀请信有常见的篇首和篇尾句的套话或格式,备考时可充分训练和准备。考场上应用文写作是热身,写好了、写顺了,会提升读后续写或概要写作的信心,抢占作文写作的先机。
[二、应用文评分的标准定位]
1.本题总分为15 分,按以下5 个档次给分。评分时,先根据文章的内容和语言初步确定其所属档次,然后以该档次的要求来衡量,确定或调整档次,最后给分。
第一档:(1-3 分)只能写出一两个要点;语言错误很多,只有个别句子正确。
第二档:(4-6 分)能写出部分要点;语言错误多,影响意思表达。
第三档:(7-9 分)能写明基本要点;语言虽有较多错误,但能基本达意。
第四档:(10-12 分)能写明全部或绝大部分要点;语言有少量错误;行文不够连贯,表达基本清楚。
第五档:(13-15 分)能写明全部要点;语言基本无误;行文连贯,表达清楚。
2.字数少于60 和多于100 的,从总分中减去2 分。
3.评分时,应注意的主要内容为:时态、人称、内容要点、应用词汇和语法结构的数量和准确性、上下文的连贯性及语言的得体性。
4.拼写与标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面,评分时,应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑。英、美拼写及词汇用法均可接受。
5.如书写较差,以致影响交际,将分数降低一个档次。
[三、应用文写作的风格定位]
本次高考应用文写作是常见的邀请邮件,我们首先要定位与受邀者的关系,是上级还是朋友?是正式公文邀请还是普通邀约?身份关系的不同须使用不同的交际用语,不符合身份的用语会导致交际的不得体,从而失去交际功效。
本次郊游是朋友间的活动(题目没有具体指定是官方还是私人活动),而且邀请了外国友人,所以最好是一封非正式的邀请邮件。要讲清楚参与者、时间以及地点,这些细节还可以适当发挥,如出发的时间地点、出行方式,爬山以及野餐的具体安排和注意事项,体现邀请者的精心策划和盛情邀约,使行文连贯,诚恳礼貌,亲切自然。
因此,我们写本篇邮件的时候,语言语气的风格定位是既简单又实用、既亲切又不失规范。如果文章遣词造句太过追求华丽,或生硬套用一些过于正式邀请函的句型,就会适得其反。如:
1. How are you doing? I am fine. (寒暄太过了,不符合英语文化习惯。不如直截了当,切入正题)
建议改成:Dear Chris,I am writing to invite you to a mountain hiking this Saturday.
2. I’m greatly honored to extend my sincere invitation to you to a mountain hiking. (非常正式的公务邀请,用在本文显得格外生疏)
建议改成:I’m writing to invite you to a tour to the West Mountain Park this Saturday.
3. Your attention to this activity would be highly appreciated. (太正式的结尾,让人不轻松)
建议改成:Would you please let me know as soon as possible if you can accept my invitation?
[四、應用文写作范文]
第一节 :应用文写作(满分15分)
假定你是李华,计划组织一次郊游,请给你的英国朋友Chris 写封邮件邀请他参加。内容包括:
1.参与者;
2.时间、地点;
3.活动:登山、野餐等。
注意:
1.词数80左右;
2.可以适当增加细节,以使行文连贯。
[优秀范文]
Dear Chris,
I’m writing to invite you to join us in climbing the Fragrant Hill this Saturday.
We are scheduled to gather at the school gate and set out by bus at 8:00 a.m. sharp. After climbing to the top of the hill, we will enjoy our picnic lunch there. At about 2:00 p.m., we will go down the hill along another path. Meanwhile, you may equip yourself with a camera to capture the pleasant moments and beautiful scenery. Up till now, 6 boys and 5 girls have joined the team. Looking forward to your involvement.
Yours,
Joe
点评
这篇文章覆盖了所有内容要点,应用了较多的语法结构和词汇,作者表现出了很强的语言运用能力。
第一段开门见山,“Dear Chris”称呼大方,同时也免去了老朋友之间的不必要的寒暄,直奔主题 “I’m writing to invite you”,亲切自然,說明人物时间事件:邀请朋友 “join...in...”参加爬香山的活动“climbing the Fragrant Hill this Saturday”。本段简单亲切,实用性强。
第二段合理拓展,详细描述活动行程安排,体现了邀请者细心的考虑,从而凸显真诚的邀约。语言简约而不简单,如“are scheduled to”,“at 8:00 a.m. sharp”,“enjoy our picnic lunch”,“equip yourself with”,“capture”等词语使用恰当、自然、地道。合理运用非谓语动词, 如“After climbing”,“to capture”等;巧妙运用衔接词,如“Meanwhile”等,让句子之间联系更为紧凑。更为巧妙的是,作者借用带上相机捕捉美妙时光和自然美景,既向受邀者说明了必要的旅行装备,又突出了活动的亮点,一石二鸟。
第三段既是礼貌性结尾,又向受邀者“汇报”了活动情况,从而达到诚挚邀请的目的,能让受邀者立即回复。这样的段落编排逻辑完善,环环相扣。
整篇文章如行云流水,留白合理,言简意赅,不但清晰地把信息传达给了受邀者,同时也让受邀者欣然前往,是一篇不可多得的好习作。
[五、邀请与祝贺信的准备]
【篇首句】介绍自己,简要说明活动,并邀请对方。
1. 我是来自育才学校的李华,学生会主席。 I’m Li Hua from Yucai School,the president of the Student Union.
2. 我们学校有一场英语演讲比赛将在8月6日举行。 An English speaking contest of our school will be held on August 6.
3. 周日,在我的花园里会举行一场聚会。There will be a party in my garden on Sunday.
4. 我想邀请你做它的裁判。 I’d like to invite you to judge it.
5. 我写信是邀请你…… I’m writing to invite you to...
6.我很荣幸地邀请你…… It’s my pleasure/a great honor for me to invite you to...
7. 很遗憾你不久就要回美国了。所以,这周六,在阳光俱乐部我们会为你举行一个欢送会。下午六点你能来吗? It’s a pity that you have to go back to America soon. So a farewell party for you will be held in the Sun Club this Saturday. Could you come at 6:00 p.m.?
8.我很荣幸受邀参加这么有意义的活动。 I feel it a great honor to be invited to get involved in such a meaningful activity.
【篇中句】介绍活动具体内容,并说明受邀人参加理由。
1.它将于下午两点钟开始,四点钟结束,在此期间将会有十五位准备充分的参赛者发表演讲。It will begin at 2:00 p.m. and last two hours, during which time 15 well-prepared contestants will deliver their speeches.
2.我们将会在上午八点出发,九点到达那里。We will start at 8:00 a.m. and arrive there at 9:00.
3.记得带上水和午餐。Remember to take water and lunch with you.
4.顺便说一下,你可以乘坐你家公寓前的322路公交车,它会直接把你带到俱乐部。By the way, you may take Bus No. 322 in front of your apartment and it will take you directly to the club.
5.我知道你的母语是英语,还是一个英语老师。我,代表我们学校,真诚地邀请你来比赛现场。I know you are a native speaker of English and an English teacher, and I, on behalf of our school, sincerely invite you to be part of the contest.
6.既然你如此渴望提高英语,这会是一个很好的机会。Since you are so eager to improve your English, it will prove to be a great chance.
7.我保证你在那里会过得很愉快。I’m sure that you will enjoy yourself there. 【篇尾句】期待对方接受邀请,并期待对方尽快回复。
1.那期间你有空吗?请方便时尽快给我打电话1234567。Will you be available during that time? Please contact me at 1234567 at your earliest convenience.
2.请尽快告诉我你能否接受我的邀请好吗? Would you please let me know as soon as possible if you can accept my invitation?
3.如果你能来,我们会非常荣幸。We would feel much honored if you could come. /to have you there with us.
4.期待着你的到来。We are looking forward to your coming with great pleasure./ I am longing to see you soon./We sincerely hope that you make it.
5.请你就此类事情提供建议。我将不胜感激。 I’d appreciate it if you could offer some advice on such a matter. /Your attention to this letter would be highly appreciated.
6.如果你能将关于该项活动的有关信息发给我,我将不胜感激。 I would be forever grateful if you could send me information concerning /regarding the activity.
[优秀范文——祝贺]
假如你是李华,你的好友魏芳在中学生英语演讲比赛中荣获一等奖,请你根据以下内容,给她写一封祝贺信。内容包括:1.表达你的愉悦心情;2.向她表示祝贺;3.请她介绍成功的经验。
Dear Wei Fang,
I hear that you have won first prize in the English Speech Contest of Middle School Students, so I’m writing to give my sincere congratulations.
You don’t know how excited I was when I heard the good news. As your best friend, I am proud of you! Your pronunciation and fluent English left me with deep impression. It came as no surprise to me that you won the contest. Could you share with me how you improve your spoken English? Your experience will be of great help to me in learning.
I will be grateful if you can write me back and give me your advice. I am looking forward to your early reply.
Yours,
Li Hua
[優秀范文——邀请]
假定你是李华,你校在3月22日“世界水日”来临之际将举办系列活动。请写封邮件给学校英语外教Green,请他为本校学生开设讲座。邮件的内容包括: 1.讲座主题:废水处理与利用;2.讲座目的;3.讲座时间及时长。
Dear Mr. Green,
With World Water Day around the corner, our school is planning a series of activities. I'm writing to invite you to give us a lecture on the topic of wastewater disposal and utilization.
The lecture will be held in our School Hall from 4:00 to 5:30 on the afternoon of March 19. We hope it can arouse students' awareness of water crisis as well as develop the habit of water recycling. If everyone can make good use of water, we together can make a big difference.
I would be grateful if you could accept my invitation. I'm looking forward to your early reply.
Yours,
Li Hua
1.应用文以写对为首要任务,不要运用太过花哨的语言表达,应以自然舒服为主。
2.写应用文首先要切题,要点清晰,无关信息不要拓展;其次,要严格把控字数,字数太多反而扣分;再次,重视语言基本功,比如,先说地点再说时间,时间地点按由小到大的顺序,而这些常识性的知识在考场作文上却大量出错。
3.考生应熟悉各种体裁应用文的首尾格式,文本正文部分要在写清要点的基础上争取用上一些原汁原味的词汇和短语来博取阅卷老师的印象分。
4.卷面整洁、字迹漂亮非常重要,一篇作文书写和字迹好坏可相差2-3分,两篇就是4-6分,学生练好字,收益很大。
反思阅卷老师的现场感受,对我们进一步认清应用文写作的训练方向,强化应用文写作的备考措施,有着积极的指导作用。
[一、应用文写作的应试定位]
浙江新高考英语的应用文写作应该定位为小作文,需要“短平快”,不能“小题大做”而耗时过多。结合应用文的交际文体特点,应在12-15分钟内完成地道、得体、简约、清晰的小作文。切忌过于追求复杂句式和华丽词汇。
本次高考的邀请信有常见的篇首和篇尾句的套话或格式,备考时可充分训练和准备。考场上应用文写作是热身,写好了、写顺了,会提升读后续写或概要写作的信心,抢占作文写作的先机。
[二、应用文评分的标准定位]
1.本题总分为15 分,按以下5 个档次给分。评分时,先根据文章的内容和语言初步确定其所属档次,然后以该档次的要求来衡量,确定或调整档次,最后给分。
第一档:(1-3 分)只能写出一两个要点;语言错误很多,只有个别句子正确。
第二档:(4-6 分)能写出部分要点;语言错误多,影响意思表达。
第三档:(7-9 分)能写明基本要点;语言虽有较多错误,但能基本达意。
第四档:(10-12 分)能写明全部或绝大部分要点;语言有少量错误;行文不够连贯,表达基本清楚。
第五档:(13-15 分)能写明全部要点;语言基本无误;行文连贯,表达清楚。
2.字数少于60 和多于100 的,从总分中减去2 分。
3.评分时,应注意的主要内容为:时态、人称、内容要点、应用词汇和语法结构的数量和准确性、上下文的连贯性及语言的得体性。
4.拼写与标点符号是语言准确性的一个方面,评分时,应视其对交际的影响程度予以考虑。英、美拼写及词汇用法均可接受。
5.如书写较差,以致影响交际,将分数降低一个档次。
[三、应用文写作的风格定位]
本次高考应用文写作是常见的邀请邮件,我们首先要定位与受邀者的关系,是上级还是朋友?是正式公文邀请还是普通邀约?身份关系的不同须使用不同的交际用语,不符合身份的用语会导致交际的不得体,从而失去交际功效。
本次郊游是朋友间的活动(题目没有具体指定是官方还是私人活动),而且邀请了外国友人,所以最好是一封非正式的邀请邮件。要讲清楚参与者、时间以及地点,这些细节还可以适当发挥,如出发的时间地点、出行方式,爬山以及野餐的具体安排和注意事项,体现邀请者的精心策划和盛情邀约,使行文连贯,诚恳礼貌,亲切自然。
因此,我们写本篇邮件的时候,语言语气的风格定位是既简单又实用、既亲切又不失规范。如果文章遣词造句太过追求华丽,或生硬套用一些过于正式邀请函的句型,就会适得其反。如:
1. How are you doing? I am fine. (寒暄太过了,不符合英语文化习惯。不如直截了当,切入正题)
建议改成:Dear Chris,I am writing to invite you to a mountain hiking this Saturday.
2. I’m greatly honored to extend my sincere invitation to you to a mountain hiking. (非常正式的公务邀请,用在本文显得格外生疏)
建议改成:I’m writing to invite you to a tour to the West Mountain Park this Saturday.
3. Your attention to this activity would be highly appreciated. (太正式的结尾,让人不轻松)
建议改成:Would you please let me know as soon as possible if you can accept my invitation?
[四、應用文写作范文]
第一节 :应用文写作(满分15分)
假定你是李华,计划组织一次郊游,请给你的英国朋友Chris 写封邮件邀请他参加。内容包括:
1.参与者;
2.时间、地点;
3.活动:登山、野餐等。
注意:
1.词数80左右;
2.可以适当增加细节,以使行文连贯。
[优秀范文]
Dear Chris,
I’m writing to invite you to join us in climbing the Fragrant Hill this Saturday.
We are scheduled to gather at the school gate and set out by bus at 8:00 a.m. sharp. After climbing to the top of the hill, we will enjoy our picnic lunch there. At about 2:00 p.m., we will go down the hill along another path. Meanwhile, you may equip yourself with a camera to capture the pleasant moments and beautiful scenery. Up till now, 6 boys and 5 girls have joined the team. Looking forward to your involvement.
Yours,
Joe
点评
这篇文章覆盖了所有内容要点,应用了较多的语法结构和词汇,作者表现出了很强的语言运用能力。
第一段开门见山,“Dear Chris”称呼大方,同时也免去了老朋友之间的不必要的寒暄,直奔主题 “I’m writing to invite you”,亲切自然,說明人物时间事件:邀请朋友 “join...in...”参加爬香山的活动“climbing the Fragrant Hill this Saturday”。本段简单亲切,实用性强。
第二段合理拓展,详细描述活动行程安排,体现了邀请者细心的考虑,从而凸显真诚的邀约。语言简约而不简单,如“are scheduled to”,“at 8:00 a.m. sharp”,“enjoy our picnic lunch”,“equip yourself with”,“capture”等词语使用恰当、自然、地道。合理运用非谓语动词, 如“After climbing”,“to capture”等;巧妙运用衔接词,如“Meanwhile”等,让句子之间联系更为紧凑。更为巧妙的是,作者借用带上相机捕捉美妙时光和自然美景,既向受邀者说明了必要的旅行装备,又突出了活动的亮点,一石二鸟。
第三段既是礼貌性结尾,又向受邀者“汇报”了活动情况,从而达到诚挚邀请的目的,能让受邀者立即回复。这样的段落编排逻辑完善,环环相扣。
整篇文章如行云流水,留白合理,言简意赅,不但清晰地把信息传达给了受邀者,同时也让受邀者欣然前往,是一篇不可多得的好习作。
[五、邀请与祝贺信的准备]
【篇首句】介绍自己,简要说明活动,并邀请对方。
1. 我是来自育才学校的李华,学生会主席。 I’m Li Hua from Yucai School,the president of the Student Union.
2. 我们学校有一场英语演讲比赛将在8月6日举行。 An English speaking contest of our school will be held on August 6.
3. 周日,在我的花园里会举行一场聚会。There will be a party in my garden on Sunday.
4. 我想邀请你做它的裁判。 I’d like to invite you to judge it.
5. 我写信是邀请你…… I’m writing to invite you to...
6.我很荣幸地邀请你…… It’s my pleasure/a great honor for me to invite you to...
7. 很遗憾你不久就要回美国了。所以,这周六,在阳光俱乐部我们会为你举行一个欢送会。下午六点你能来吗? It’s a pity that you have to go back to America soon. So a farewell party for you will be held in the Sun Club this Saturday. Could you come at 6:00 p.m.?
8.我很荣幸受邀参加这么有意义的活动。 I feel it a great honor to be invited to get involved in such a meaningful activity.
【篇中句】介绍活动具体内容,并说明受邀人参加理由。
1.它将于下午两点钟开始,四点钟结束,在此期间将会有十五位准备充分的参赛者发表演讲。It will begin at 2:00 p.m. and last two hours, during which time 15 well-prepared contestants will deliver their speeches.
2.我们将会在上午八点出发,九点到达那里。We will start at 8:00 a.m. and arrive there at 9:00.
3.记得带上水和午餐。Remember to take water and lunch with you.
4.顺便说一下,你可以乘坐你家公寓前的322路公交车,它会直接把你带到俱乐部。By the way, you may take Bus No. 322 in front of your apartment and it will take you directly to the club.
5.我知道你的母语是英语,还是一个英语老师。我,代表我们学校,真诚地邀请你来比赛现场。I know you are a native speaker of English and an English teacher, and I, on behalf of our school, sincerely invite you to be part of the contest.
6.既然你如此渴望提高英语,这会是一个很好的机会。Since you are so eager to improve your English, it will prove to be a great chance.
7.我保证你在那里会过得很愉快。I’m sure that you will enjoy yourself there. 【篇尾句】期待对方接受邀请,并期待对方尽快回复。
1.那期间你有空吗?请方便时尽快给我打电话1234567。Will you be available during that time? Please contact me at 1234567 at your earliest convenience.
2.请尽快告诉我你能否接受我的邀请好吗? Would you please let me know as soon as possible if you can accept my invitation?
3.如果你能来,我们会非常荣幸。We would feel much honored if you could come. /to have you there with us.
4.期待着你的到来。We are looking forward to your coming with great pleasure./ I am longing to see you soon./We sincerely hope that you make it.
5.请你就此类事情提供建议。我将不胜感激。 I’d appreciate it if you could offer some advice on such a matter. /Your attention to this letter would be highly appreciated.
6.如果你能将关于该项活动的有关信息发给我,我将不胜感激。 I would be forever grateful if you could send me information concerning /regarding the activity.
[优秀范文——祝贺]
假如你是李华,你的好友魏芳在中学生英语演讲比赛中荣获一等奖,请你根据以下内容,给她写一封祝贺信。内容包括:1.表达你的愉悦心情;2.向她表示祝贺;3.请她介绍成功的经验。
Dear Wei Fang,
I hear that you have won first prize in the English Speech Contest of Middle School Students, so I’m writing to give my sincere congratulations.
You don’t know how excited I was when I heard the good news. As your best friend, I am proud of you! Your pronunciation and fluent English left me with deep impression. It came as no surprise to me that you won the contest. Could you share with me how you improve your spoken English? Your experience will be of great help to me in learning.
I will be grateful if you can write me back and give me your advice. I am looking forward to your early reply.
Yours,
Li Hua
[優秀范文——邀请]
假定你是李华,你校在3月22日“世界水日”来临之际将举办系列活动。请写封邮件给学校英语外教Green,请他为本校学生开设讲座。邮件的内容包括: 1.讲座主题:废水处理与利用;2.讲座目的;3.讲座时间及时长。
Dear Mr. Green,
With World Water Day around the corner, our school is planning a series of activities. I'm writing to invite you to give us a lecture on the topic of wastewater disposal and utilization.
The lecture will be held in our School Hall from 4:00 to 5:30 on the afternoon of March 19. We hope it can arouse students' awareness of water crisis as well as develop the habit of water recycling. If everyone can make good use of water, we together can make a big difference.
I would be grateful if you could accept my invitation. I'm looking forward to your early reply.
Yours,
Li Hua