没有什么会如你所想

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  You lose your love for her and then
  It is her who is lost,
  And then it is both who are lost,
  And nothing is ever as perfect as you want it to be.
  In a very ordinary world
  A most extraordinary pain mingles with the small routines, The loss seems huge and yet
  Nothing can be pinned down or fully explained.
  You are afraid.
  If you found the perfect love
  It would scald your hands,
  Rip the skin from your nerves,
  Cause havoc with a computered heart.
  You lose your love for her and then
  It is her who is lost.
  You tried not to hurt and yet
  Everything you touched became a wound.
  You tried to mend what cannot be mended,
  You tried, neither foolish nor clumsy,
  To rescue what cannot be rescued.
  You failed,
  And now she is elsewhere
  And her night and your night
  Are both utterly drained.
  How easy it would be,
  If love could be brought home like a lost kitten
  Or gathered in like strawberries,
  How lovely it would be;
  But nothing is ever as perfect as you want it to be.
  你对她的爱消失
  她也就随之消失,
  而后彼此全部消失,
  从来就没什么如你所想的那般完美。
  在一个相当平凡的世界里
  一份最不平凡的痛苦往往与那些日常琐事杂糅一起,损失貌似惨重,然而
  没什么定论可言,也解释不清。
  你害怕了。
  如若你寻得完美爱情
  它将烫伤你的双手,
  让皮肤与你的神经剥离,
  给一颗电脑控制的心脏蹂躏破坏。
  你对她的爱消失
  她也就随之消失。
  你尽量不去伤害,然而
  你触碰的一切都会变成伤口。
  你试图修复无法被修复的东西,你试图,既不蠢也不笨,
  挽救无法被挽救的事情。
  你失败了,
  她现已身在别处她的夜和你的夜都已耗之殆尽。
  如若爱能像把一只迷途的小猫带回家那样又或像是采摘草莓那样,
  那将是何等轻而易举,
  那将是何等可爱;
  但从来就没什么如你所想的那般完美。
  布莱恩·帕顿(Brian Patten),1946年出生于利物浦,在一个现今已被拆毁的工人阶级街区长大,被认为是欧洲当代诗人的领军人物之一,与埃德里安·亨利(Adrian Henri)和罗杰·麦高尔(Roger McGough)一同,被称为利物浦诗人“三剑客”。帕顿15岁辍学,成为《布特尔时报》(The Bootle Times)的一名初级记者,并在该报开辟了一个流行音乐专栏;16岁时他编辑发行了杂志——《斗败了的狗》(Underdog),这份杂志为当时利物浦的地下诗人提供了一个平台,并持续刊登了像艾伦·金斯伯格和安德烈·沃兹涅先斯基那样的国际诗人的作品;21岁时,帕顿出版了第一本个人诗集——《小约翰尼的忏悔》(Little Johnny’s Confessions,1967),这部诗集获得了文学界的众多肯定;帕顿成名后出版了不计其数的诗集,其中诗集《无敌舰队》(Armada,1996)反响最为轰动,诗集中收录了一些关于其母亲的死亡以及其童年记忆的诗;近年来他最重要的著作——《爱情诗集》(The Collected Love Poems)由 Harper Perennial出版社发行出版。
  “从来就没什么如你所想的那般完美”——这是多么美丽而又残忍的一句诗,人们往往用自己在想象中假设出来的一个个如果来填补心中难平的沟壑,而帕顿硬是要让你的爱情梦在想象中醒来。不论你将爱情想象得何等完美,他都要告诉你,完美的爱情会伤人,而最不平凡的痛苦也只是杂糅于鸡毛蒜皮的琐事之中,犹如大爱无言、真水无香。诗中表达出的遗憾感,既平淡,又真切。读完这首诗,你不禁想要赞叹帕顿的真诚,因为有句话这样讲:“先有必不可解之情,而后方有必不可朽之诗”!
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