Ayesha Bilal didn’t let having nine children under 18 stop her going to university. Thirty-nine years old, and with nine children, Ayesha Bilal was never going to be the kind of student who watches daytime TV. “I married when I was 21, and my now-ex-husband 1)was not into me working,” she says. “Having one child after another was not my plan—but it was my life for the next 16 years.”
　　“I decided I’d had enough in 2003—my marriage was 2)going downhill and my youngest was two. I wanted to do something with my life. A friend told me about the ‘Two-plus-Two’course at 3)Warwick University and I thought, ‘I could do that.’”
　　The course is designed for people who have been out of education for a while. When she completes the course, Ayesha will be awarded a 4)BA in Early Childhood Studies.
　　A good friend, Aisha, also a mother of nine children, offered to help with childcare, and Ayesha’s dream began to 5)crystallize. But fate 6)had one more challenge up its sleeve.
　　“I only had eight children when I applied for the course. Within 10 minutes of finding out I was expecting my ninth child I received a call to tell me that Warwick had accepted me. They asked if I wanted to 7)defer, but I thought, if I don’t do it now I’ll never go back.”
　　Ayesha gave birth at the end of her first year, followed immediately by her exams. “I took my college bag into hospital to revise—you get so bored while you’re waiting for 8)labor!”
　　For Ayesha, though, the practical challenges have been as 9)integral a part of her sense of personal transformation as her coursework.“When you’ve been at home a long time, running around after children, you lose yourself as an individual. These two years have brought me back to being Ayesha.”
　　“This year has been about confidence. I’ve managed to get through two years of a BA when others have dropped out. I consider that a personal achievement. The 10)highlight of my year was finding out I’d passed and could go on to university. On the first day I 11)had butterflies. It is such a big place, with thousands of people—you feel like an ant. I just thought, ‘where do I go?’ But, I’m here with the ‘big girls’ now, and I feel really proud.”
　　Ayesha is 12)adamant that she doesn’t want special treatment. “I don’t go round telling people at university that I have nine children, although people are pretty 13)gobsmacked when they find out. The response is usually, ‘You don’t look old enough,’ and then, ‘How do you get through it all?’ ”
　　“I have a friend on the course with three children who says that if she feels down she thinks of me for inspiration. And in turn that pushes me.”
　　“It’s not easy, though. My computer has broken and I have three assignments due after the Christmas break. At the same time, my second eldest has been poorly, my youngest is 14)teething, and I’ve had to focus on what’s best for them and less on my studies. There have been occasions when I’ve been at university and thought, ‘What am I doing here, I need to be at home.’ Ultimately, though, I am doing this to create a better life for me and my children.”
　　“I have always dreamed about opening my own nursery. Now I’m interested in other fields as well. My 15)perception of my own potential has opened up, just as my life has. So much has changed to get to this point, and it’s nice to hear my kids say things like, ‘Mum’s doing an assignment.’ I’ve booked tickets for them to see a play next week, which I would never have done before.”
　　“I look back now and don’t recognize myself—I was just living life and accepting, that was how it is. Now I know I can make changes. When one door closes, another door opens—and when you go through one open door you find a lot of other doors open, too.”
　　埃莎·比拉尔有九个未满18岁的孩子，但这并没有阻止她要上大学的决心。埃莎·比拉尔今年三十九岁，有九个孩子，但她永远不会成为一个有闲暇看日间电视节目的学生。“我结婚时才21岁，现在已成为我前夫的他不喜欢我出去工作，”她说，“我并没有打算要接连不断地生孩子，但事实上，婚后的16年里这样的事情却在接连不断地发生。”
　　“2003年，我下定决心不再生孩子——我的婚姻开始走下坡路，那时候我最小的孩子才两岁。我希望自己的生活有所成就。一位朋友告诉我华威大学有一个‘二加二’课程，我心想，‘我能行。’”
　　该课程是专为那些离开学校已有一段日子的人而开设的。完成课程后，埃莎将被授予幼儿教育学学士学位。
　　埃莎的一位好朋友阿伊莎，也是一位育有九个孩子的母亲，她愿意帮助埃莎带孩子，于是埃莎的梦想之路开始变得明确起来。但命运之神又给她出了一道难题。
　　“我申请该课程时，还只有八个孩子。在我得知自己怀上了第九个孩子的十分钟内，我接到一个电话，来电者告诉我说，华威大学录取我了。他们问我是否希望推迟入学，但我想，如果我现在不去做的话，怕是永远都回不去了。”
　　埃莎在第一学年末产下了她的第九个孩子，分娩后马上就要参加期末考试。“我把大学课本带到医院去复习——等着分娩的时间很无聊！”
　　然而，对于埃莎来说，现实生活中的挑战已经与她的功课一样，成为她个人转变中不可分割的一部分。“当你长期呆在家里，追着孩子到处跑时，你就失去了自我。这两年来我又再次做回了原来那个埃莎。”
　　“这一年是建立信心的一年。当别人辍学时，我已经成功拿到了两年制学士学位。我认为这是一项个人成就。我今年的亮点是发现自己通过了考试并且可以升上大学进修。入学的第一天，我满心惶恐，忐忑不安。大学校园如此之大，有着成千上万的人，你觉得自己就像一只蚂蚁般渺小。我就在想，‘我要去哪里？’但是，现在我与这里的‘女大学生们’在一起，我感到非常自豪。”
　　埃莎坚定地提出，她不想要特殊待遇。“我不会在大学里到处去跟人说自己有九个孩子，尽管当他们了解情况后都会目瞪口呆。他们的反应通常是：‘你看上去不像有九个孩子那么老呀，’接着他们会说：‘你是怎么熬过来的？’”
　　“我有一个朋友也在上这门课程，她是一位有着三个孩子的母亲。她说，如果她感到沮丧，她就会想到我，从而鼓励自己。而她的话反过来也鞭策着我。”
　　“但这也并非易事。我的电脑坏了，圣诞假期后我有三份作业要上交。与此同时，我的第二个孩子身体一直不太好，最小的孩子正在长牙，我不得不把重心放在他们身上，对于学习有些力不从心。有那么几次，当我在学校里时，我会想，‘我在这里做什么，我应该在家里啊。’然而最终，我在这里学习，旨在为自己也为我的孩子们创造更美好的生活。”
　　“我一直梦想着创办自己的托儿所。现在我感兴趣的还有其他领域。对于自己的潜力，我有了更深刻的认识，正如对自己的人生那样。事到如今，有太多的改变。听到孩子们说‘妈妈正在做作业呢’之类的话时，我觉得很开心。我已经为孩子们买好下周去看演出的票了，这是我以前从未做过的。”
　　“现在，我回想过去，已经认不出自己——过去的我只是做一天和尚撞一天钟，就那样过着吧。现在，我知道自己可以做出一些改变。当一扇门关上时，另一扇门会打开——当你穿过一扇敞开的门时，你会发现还有很多门也为你敞开着。”