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Surviving the fatal ‘how do I look’ question
怎样得体而不失真诚地回答
“我穿這件衣服好看吗”？
You are what you wear—or， as the ancient saying goes： “The clothes make the man， just like the saddle makes the horse.” People have always used fashion to signal their wealth， creativity， or taste， as much as covering up or keeping warm.
But how do you tell if an outfit looks good？ Some people turn to their friends， when they feel like they can’t trust the mirror or a pushy salesperson. Such conversations， though， are studded with landmines. Anyone who has been asked the fateful question “How do I look in this？” knows the internal struggle—being truthful without causing offense， or complimenting without sounding insincere. Some language skills are necessary to come out of these conversations with your friendships intact.
Flatter cleverly
Positive feedback is usually pretty safe， but flattery is also a science. A vague compliment like “you look good” is meaningless， and may even raise suspicions that you’re being less than truthful. Name specific features you like about the look：
A： How do I look in this dress？
W6 chu`n zh- ti1o q%nzi h2ok3n ma？
我穿这条裙子好看吗？
B： You look great！ The length suits you， and you look very slim！
T-bi9 h2ok3n！ Ch1ngd& f8ich1ng h9sh#， h1i xi2n sh7u！
特别好看！长度非常合适，
还显瘦！
Be careful， though： Someone insecure about their weight might interpret this to mean you think they normally look fat. If you aren’t close， or simply want a safer option， focus on the clothes rather than the body—any outfit has its good points：
A： What do you think of these jeans？
N@ ju9de zh- ti1o ni%z2ik& z0nmey3ng？
你觉得这条牛仔裤怎么样？
B： They are perfect for this time of year！
Zh-ge j#ji9 zh-ngh2o chu`n！
这个季节正好穿！
If you really can’t find anything good to say， try：
It’s nice to see you try a different style！
N@ ch1ngsh# y！xia x～nf8ngg9 y0 t@ng h2o de！
你尝试一下新风格也挺好的！
Let them down gently
If an outfit looks hideous， your friend would probably rather hear it from you than someone else. It’s not easy to tell people their clothes don’t suit them without hurting their feelings， but the basic rule still applies： Criticize the outfit， rather than the person.
The shape of this jacket is not very good; it makes people look bloated. Zh- ji3n ji`k- b2nx！ng b% t3i h2o， xi2nde r9n y4ngzh6ng.
这件夹克版型不太好，显得人
臃肿。
Or you can point to some external factors， like the season or match ：
A： These boots are so cool！
Zh- shu`ng xu8zi zh8n k&！
这双靴子真酷！
B： Yes， but their color doesn’t match most of your clothes. If you buy them， you will have to get a new coat， and maybe a new bag.
Sh# h0n k&. D3nsh# zh- y1ns- h9 n@ d3du4sh& y～fu d4u b& d`. R%gu6 n@ m2i le zh- shu`ng xu8zi， ji& d0i z3i m2i y！ ji3n w3it3o l1i p-i， sh-nzh# h1i x$y3o y！ g- x～n b`o.
是很酷。但是这颜色和你大多数衣服都不搭。如果你买了这双靴子，就得再买一件外套来配，甚至还需要一个新包。
“Trends” are a good excuse to convince someone out of buying something—after all， the weight of opinions from fashion experts are behind you：
A： How do you like this skirt？
N@ ju9de zh- ti1o du2nq%n z0nmey3ng？
你觉得这条短裙怎么样？
B： It’s nice， but warm colors are in this year. Why don’t you try that red one？
T@ng h2ok3n de， d3nsh# j～nni1n li%x！ng nu2ns-， y3obu n@ sh#shi n3 ji3n h5ngs- de？
挺好看的，但是今年流行暖色，
要不你试试那件红色的？
Not everyone follows the latest fashions， though. In an era where even ordinary folks aspire to be celebrities， many prefer a unique style over a trendy one. The Chinese term 撞衫 （zhu3ngsh`n， “clash of clothing”） describes the feeling of embarrassment that supposedly results when two people show up to the same event in the same outfit. It can also be used to convince a friend not to blindly follow fashions that don’t suit them：
A： I really like this sweater. It’s all the rage these days.
W6 f8ich1ng x@huan zh- ji3n m1oy～， sh# zu#j#n de li%x！ngku2n.
我非常喜歡这件毛衣， 是最近的流行款。
B： It’s popular， but I’m afraid you’ll find it easy to clash with someone else.
Li%x！ng sh# li%x！ng. D3nsh# w6 d`nx～n k0n9ng f8ich1ng r5ngy# zhu3ngsh`n.
流行是流行。但是我担心可能非常容易撞衫。
Suggest skillfully
Why do people consult friends before they buy clothes？ For many， it’s because they genuinely want a second opinion. In these cases， idle flattery won’t cut it， so don’t shy away from a definite yes or no—they’re going to make a choice anyway， so why not offer help？
However， many people who repeatedly ask whether they should buy something have already made up their mind; the only thing they really want is your support：
A： I like it very much. But it’s too expensive！ W6 h0n x@huan t`， d3nsh# du# w6 l1i shu4 t3i gu# le！
我很喜欢它，但是对我来说太贵了！
B： It’s not easy to find something you love. Just go for it！
N1nd9 y&d3o zh-me h9 x～ny# de d4ngxi， y2oy1 m2i le ba！
难得遇到这么合心意的东西，咬牙买了吧！
Of course， TWOC doesn’t promote excessive consumption. If you feel it’s really not a good idea to buy something， the term “性价比 （x#ngji3b@， quality-to-price ratio）” is a persuasive and wise-sounding argument against any purchase：
These high-heels look fabulous， but to be frank， there aren’t many occasions in a year when you’d get to wear them. I think the quality-to-price ratio is pretty low.
Zh- shu`ng g`og8nxi9 k3nzhe h0n pi3oliang. D3nsh# shu4 sh！hu3， n@ y# ni1n y0 chu`n bu li2o j@ c#， w6 ju9de x#ngji3b@ t@ng d～ de.
这双高跟鞋看着很漂亮。但是说实话，你一年也穿不了几次，我觉得性价比挺低的。
To buy or not is one issue; to buy Item A or Item B is an even worse dilemma. For the latter， you can help by listing the strengths and weaknesses of each item：
A： Which do you prefer of these two coats？
Zh- li2ng ji3n d3y～ n@ g-ng x@huan n2 ji3n？
这两件大衣你更喜欢哪件？
B： The red one’s collar and sleeves look exquisite， but it’s too thin; you can’t wear it in the winter. The white one is a classic， and looks warm， but it’ll dirty very easily and looks hard to clean.
H5ngs- zh- ji3n de l@ngk6u h9 xi&zi k3nzhe h0n j～ngzh#， d3nsh# mi3nli3o t3i b1o le， d4ngti`n chu`n bu li2o. B1is- n3 ji3n sh# j～ngdi2nku2n， y0 b2onu2n， d3nsh# r5ngy# z`ng， 9rqi0 k3nzhe h0n n1n q～ngx@.
红色这件的领口和袖子看着很精致，但是面料太薄了， 冬天穿不了。白色那件是经典款，也保暖，但是容易脏，而且看着很难清洗。
Comparing the price is also useful：
A： I like both of these shirts！ Which one should I choose？
Zh- li2ng ji3n ch-nsh`n w6 d4u x@huan， g`i xu2n n2 ji3n h2o ne？
這两件衬衫我都喜欢，该选哪件
好呢？
B： They look the same to me. Why don’t you go with the cheaper one？
W6 k3n t`men m9i sh9nme q$bi9. M2i pi1nyi de n3 ji3n ba！
我看它们没什么区别。买便宜的那件吧！
Or， here’s an even easier answer：
They are two completely different styles. If I were you， I would buy both.
Zh- li2ng ku2n w1nqu1n sh# b&t5ng f8ngg9. R%gu6 sh# w6 dehu3， ji& li2ng ji3n d4u m2i le.
这两款完全是不同风格。如果是我的话，就两件都买了。
And if by this point， you’re tired of being dragged around the mall， and think they’re just going to buy whatever they want anyway， you can turn to flattery again to get yourself out of having to comment：
Anything is fine—a good-looking person looks good in everything.
N2 ji3n d4u h2o， zh2ngde h2ok3n de r9n chu`n sh9nme d4u h2ok3n.
哪件都好，长得好看的人穿什么都好看。
怎样得体而不失真诚地回答
“我穿這件衣服好看吗”？
You are what you wear—or， as the ancient saying goes： “The clothes make the man， just like the saddle makes the horse.” People have always used fashion to signal their wealth， creativity， or taste， as much as covering up or keeping warm.
But how do you tell if an outfit looks good？ Some people turn to their friends， when they feel like they can’t trust the mirror or a pushy salesperson. Such conversations， though， are studded with landmines. Anyone who has been asked the fateful question “How do I look in this？” knows the internal struggle—being truthful without causing offense， or complimenting without sounding insincere. Some language skills are necessary to come out of these conversations with your friendships intact.
Flatter cleverly
Positive feedback is usually pretty safe， but flattery is also a science. A vague compliment like “you look good” is meaningless， and may even raise suspicions that you’re being less than truthful. Name specific features you like about the look：
A： How do I look in this dress？
W6 chu`n zh- ti1o q%nzi h2ok3n ma？
我穿这条裙子好看吗？
B： You look great！ The length suits you， and you look very slim！
T-bi9 h2ok3n！ Ch1ngd& f8ich1ng h9sh#， h1i xi2n sh7u！
特别好看！长度非常合适，
还显瘦！
Be careful， though： Someone insecure about their weight might interpret this to mean you think they normally look fat. If you aren’t close， or simply want a safer option， focus on the clothes rather than the body—any outfit has its good points：
A： What do you think of these jeans？
N@ ju9de zh- ti1o ni%z2ik& z0nmey3ng？
你觉得这条牛仔裤怎么样？
B： They are perfect for this time of year！
Zh-ge j#ji9 zh-ngh2o chu`n！
这个季节正好穿！
If you really can’t find anything good to say， try：
It’s nice to see you try a different style！
N@ ch1ngsh# y！xia x～nf8ngg9 y0 t@ng h2o de！
你尝试一下新风格也挺好的！
Let them down gently
If an outfit looks hideous， your friend would probably rather hear it from you than someone else. It’s not easy to tell people their clothes don’t suit them without hurting their feelings， but the basic rule still applies： Criticize the outfit， rather than the person.
The shape of this jacket is not very good; it makes people look bloated. Zh- ji3n ji`k- b2nx！ng b% t3i h2o， xi2nde r9n y4ngzh6ng.
这件夹克版型不太好，显得人
臃肿。
Or you can point to some external factors， like the season or match ：
A： These boots are so cool！
Zh- shu`ng xu8zi zh8n k&！
这双靴子真酷！
B： Yes， but their color doesn’t match most of your clothes. If you buy them， you will have to get a new coat， and maybe a new bag.
Sh# h0n k&. D3nsh# zh- y1ns- h9 n@ d3du4sh& y～fu d4u b& d`. R%gu6 n@ m2i le zh- shu`ng xu8zi， ji& d0i z3i m2i y！ ji3n w3it3o l1i p-i， sh-nzh# h1i x$y3o y！ g- x～n b`o.
是很酷。但是这颜色和你大多数衣服都不搭。如果你买了这双靴子，就得再买一件外套来配，甚至还需要一个新包。
“Trends” are a good excuse to convince someone out of buying something—after all， the weight of opinions from fashion experts are behind you：
A： How do you like this skirt？
N@ ju9de zh- ti1o du2nq%n z0nmey3ng？
你觉得这条短裙怎么样？
B： It’s nice， but warm colors are in this year. Why don’t you try that red one？
T@ng h2ok3n de， d3nsh# j～nni1n li%x！ng nu2ns-， y3obu n@ sh#shi n3 ji3n h5ngs- de？
挺好看的，但是今年流行暖色，
要不你试试那件红色的？
Not everyone follows the latest fashions， though. In an era where even ordinary folks aspire to be celebrities， many prefer a unique style over a trendy one. The Chinese term 撞衫 （zhu3ngsh`n， “clash of clothing”） describes the feeling of embarrassment that supposedly results when two people show up to the same event in the same outfit. It can also be used to convince a friend not to blindly follow fashions that don’t suit them：
A： I really like this sweater. It’s all the rage these days.
W6 f8ich1ng x@huan zh- ji3n m1oy～， sh# zu#j#n de li%x！ngku2n.
我非常喜歡这件毛衣， 是最近的流行款。
B： It’s popular， but I’m afraid you’ll find it easy to clash with someone else.
Li%x！ng sh# li%x！ng. D3nsh# w6 d`nx～n k0n9ng f8ich1ng r5ngy# zhu3ngsh`n.
流行是流行。但是我担心可能非常容易撞衫。
Suggest skillfully
Why do people consult friends before they buy clothes？ For many， it’s because they genuinely want a second opinion. In these cases， idle flattery won’t cut it， so don’t shy away from a definite yes or no—they’re going to make a choice anyway， so why not offer help？
However， many people who repeatedly ask whether they should buy something have already made up their mind; the only thing they really want is your support：
A： I like it very much. But it’s too expensive！ W6 h0n x@huan t`， d3nsh# du# w6 l1i shu4 t3i gu# le！
我很喜欢它，但是对我来说太贵了！
B： It’s not easy to find something you love. Just go for it！
N1nd9 y&d3o zh-me h9 x～ny# de d4ngxi， y2oy1 m2i le ba！
难得遇到这么合心意的东西，咬牙买了吧！
Of course， TWOC doesn’t promote excessive consumption. If you feel it’s really not a good idea to buy something， the term “性价比 （x#ngji3b@， quality-to-price ratio）” is a persuasive and wise-sounding argument against any purchase：
These high-heels look fabulous， but to be frank， there aren’t many occasions in a year when you’d get to wear them. I think the quality-to-price ratio is pretty low.
Zh- shu`ng g`og8nxi9 k3nzhe h0n pi3oliang. D3nsh# shu4 sh！hu3， n@ y# ni1n y0 chu`n bu li2o j@ c#， w6 ju9de x#ngji3b@ t@ng d～ de.
这双高跟鞋看着很漂亮。但是说实话，你一年也穿不了几次，我觉得性价比挺低的。
To buy or not is one issue; to buy Item A or Item B is an even worse dilemma. For the latter， you can help by listing the strengths and weaknesses of each item：
A： Which do you prefer of these two coats？
Zh- li2ng ji3n d3y～ n@ g-ng x@huan n2 ji3n？
这两件大衣你更喜欢哪件？
B： The red one’s collar and sleeves look exquisite， but it’s too thin; you can’t wear it in the winter. The white one is a classic， and looks warm， but it’ll dirty very easily and looks hard to clean.
H5ngs- zh- ji3n de l@ngk6u h9 xi&zi k3nzhe h0n j～ngzh#， d3nsh# mi3nli3o t3i b1o le， d4ngti`n chu`n bu li2o. B1is- n3 ji3n sh# j～ngdi2nku2n， y0 b2onu2n， d3nsh# r5ngy# z`ng， 9rqi0 k3nzhe h0n n1n q～ngx@.
红色这件的领口和袖子看着很精致，但是面料太薄了， 冬天穿不了。白色那件是经典款，也保暖，但是容易脏，而且看着很难清洗。
Comparing the price is also useful：
A： I like both of these shirts！ Which one should I choose？
Zh- li2ng ji3n ch-nsh`n w6 d4u x@huan， g`i xu2n n2 ji3n h2o ne？
這两件衬衫我都喜欢，该选哪件
好呢？
B： They look the same to me. Why don’t you go with the cheaper one？
W6 k3n t`men m9i sh9nme q$bi9. M2i pi1nyi de n3 ji3n ba！
我看它们没什么区别。买便宜的那件吧！
Or， here’s an even easier answer：
They are two completely different styles. If I were you， I would buy both.
Zh- li2ng ku2n w1nqu1n sh# b&t5ng f8ngg9. R%gu6 sh# w6 dehu3， ji& li2ng ji3n d4u m2i le.
这两款完全是不同风格。如果是我的话，就两件都买了。
And if by this point， you’re tired of being dragged around the mall， and think they’re just going to buy whatever they want anyway， you can turn to flattery again to get yourself out of having to comment：
Anything is fine—a good-looking person looks good in everything.
N2 ji3n d4u h2o， zh2ngde h2ok3n de r9n chu`n sh9nme d4u h2ok3n.
哪件都好，长得好看的人穿什么都好看。