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某天在报摊上翻阅《读者》，读到了这么一则故事：美国作家布鲁斯·菲勒被诊断出患有致命的癌症后，他最担心的事情不是自己来日无多，而是两个年幼的孪生女儿会因为他的去世而失去父爱，在成长过程中留下无法弥补的缺憾。为了让女儿能够健康快乐地成长，布鲁斯想出了一个别出心裁的主意：组建一个“父亲委员会”。这样，当布鲁斯去世后，这些“代理父亲”就能替代布鲁斯履行父亲的职责，陪他的孪生女儿们玩耍、旅游，或者教她们学习诗歌、音乐……布鲁斯已经将他的故事写成了新书The Council of Dads: My Daughters, My Illness, and the Men Who Could Be Me（《父亲委员会》），好莱坞也计划将这一感人的故事拍成电影……读完之后，小编很是感动，于是决定找来这本书，和读者们分享。
因篇幅所限，这里仅选摘了该书的第一章——布鲁斯写给他那六位好友的一封信。据布鲁斯在访谈中透露，写好这封信之后，他逐一来到好友的家里，亲自读给对方听。这封情感真挚、饱含深沉父爱的“代理父亲招聘信”深深感动了那些好友们，他们全都含泪答应了布鲁斯的请求，于是“父亲委员会”得以成立。值得一提的是，尽管这个“父亲委员会”最终没能派上用场——在强大的父爱驱使下，布鲁斯努力配合治疗，用乐观的心态打破了医生的“死亡预言”，奇迹般地存活了下来——但它却会一直存在。
Bruce Feiler（布鲁斯·费勒，1964— ），生于乔治亚州的美籍犹太人，是美国颇有影响力的作家。居住在纽约的他兴趣广泛，极具冒险精神，曾跋涉一万多英里游历圣经遗迹，并据此创作出畅销一时的Walking the Bible（《圣地踪迹》）一书。该书还被拍摄成美国公共电视台的热门系列片。布鲁斯自幼接受正统的犹太教育，获得耶鲁大学学士、剑桥大学国际关系学硕士学位，其研究触角涉及宗教、日本文化、马戏团、乡村音乐等多个领域。他喜爱旅游，足迹遍布五大洲六十余国。
——Maisie
Dear—,
As you know, I have learned that I have a seven-inch cancerous 1)tumor in my left 2)femur. The afternoon I first heard the diagnosis I was standing on York Avenue in Manhattan. I sat on a 3)stoop, telephoned Linda, called my parents, and wept. I went to get some 4)crutches, stumbled home, lay down on my bed, and stared at the sky for several hours imagining all the ways my life would change.
Then Eden and Tybee came in, running and giggling and looking in the mirror. They began to do this dance they made up when they turned three a few months ago. Mixing 5)ring-around-the-rosy, ballet, and the 6)hokey-pokey, they twirled frantically in a circle, going faster and faster until they 7)tumbled onto the ground, laughing with all the glee in the world. As I watched them, I couldn’t control myself. I 8)crumbled. I kept imagining all the walks I might not take with them, the ballet 9)recitals I might not see, the art projects I might not 10)mess up, the boyfriends I might not 11)scowl at, the aisles I might not walk down.
The next few days were a 12)tangle of tears and late-night conversations, doctor consultations, insurance negotiations, determination, hopes, and fears. I quickly determined I was looking at one of three options: The lost year, the lost limb, or the lost life.
Through it all, I kept thinking I would be fine. Whatever happens, I have lived a full life. I have traveled the world. I have written ten books. I am at peace.
I also thought Linda would be fine. She would experience a lot of pain and inconvenience, but in the end she would find a way to live a life of passion and joy.
But I kept coming back to Eden and Tybee and how difficult life might be for them. Would they wonder who I was? Would they wonder what I thought? Would they lack for my approval, my discipline, my love?
My voice.
A few days later, while we were visiting my 13)in-laws on 14)Cape Cod, I woke up suddenly before dawn and thought of a way I might help recreate my voice for them. I started making a list of six men—from all parts of my life, beginning when I was a child and stretching through today. These are the men who know me best. The men who share my values. The men who helped shape and guide me. The men who traveled with me, studied with me, have been through pain and happiness with me.
Men who know my voice.
That morning I began 15)composing this letter.
I believe my daughters will have plenty of resources in their lives. They’ll have loving families. They’ll have welcoming homes. They’ll be able to go to college and travel the world. They’ll have each other. But they may not have me. They may not have their dad.
Will you help be their dad?
Will you listen in on them? Will you answer their questions? Will you take them out to lunch every now and then? Will you go to a soccer game if you’re in town? Will you watch their ballet16)moves for the 17)umpteenth time? When they get older, will you 18)indulge them in a new pair of shoes? Or buy them a new cell phone, or some other 19)gadget I can’t even imagine right now? Will you give them advice? Will you be tough as I would be? Will you help them out in a crisis? And as time passes, will you invite them to a family gathering on occasion? Will you introduce them to somebody who might help one of their dreams come true? Will you tell them what I would be thinking? Will you tell them how proud I would be?
Will you be my voice?
And as I lay on my bed that morning on Cape Cod, staring out at 20)Buzzards Bay, and hoping I didn’t wake Linda as I shook with tears, I said to myself that I would call this group of men, “The Council of Dads.”
The Council of Dads. Six men. All very busy and burdened with their own challenges, but together, collectively, they might help 21)father my potentially fatherless daughters.
Naturally I hope that I will fully recover from my illness and that we will all be able to enjoy many family occasions together in the future. But I would like my Council to continue no matter the outcome. I would like my daughters to know the world through all of you. I would like Tybee and Eden to know me through this group.
I would like them to know themselves through their Council of Dads.
I understand this request might come as something of a burden. It is not intended to be an overwhelming commitment of time, resources, or emotion. A few words, a few gestures, an open door, a welcome embrace every now and then will ensure that your presence will be a constant guide in the girls’ lives.
Your voice will merge with mine.
Even though it has been painful to write—and to 22)contemplate—this unexpected idea at this moment in our lives has brought great strength and comfort to Linda and me. We are pleased to know that our girls will learn from you some of the valuable lessons you have taught me over the years. We are 23)thrilled that we all have an excuse to keep more closely in touch in the seasons to come. And we are honored to add your fatherly counsel into the heart of our family.
And above all, we know that this assembly of 24)surrogate dads can, if needed, be me.
Love,
Bruce
亲爱的——，
如你所知，我已得知我左边股骨上长了一个七英寸大小的肿瘤。初次听到这个诊断结果的那个下午，我正站在曼哈顿的约克大街上。我在街旁的台阶坐下，给琳达打电话，又打给了我的父母，然后哭泣不止。我找了些东西充当拐杖，踉踉跄跄地走回家，躺在床上，连续几个小时盯着天空，想象着我的生活可能会产生的方方面面的变化。
正在这时，艾登和泰碧进来了，一边跑，一边看着镜子咯咯地笑。她们准备开始跳她们几个月前刚满三岁时自己编排的舞蹈。里面混合了《玫瑰圈圈舞》、芭蕾舞和hokey-pokey摇摆舞，她们疯狂地转圈，越转越快，直到跌倒在地面上，大笑着，用尽了世上所有的欢乐。 看着她们，我难以自控，我崩溃了。我禁不住去想象着：以后不能再和她们一起去散步，不能看她们参加芭蕾舞表演，无法掺和跟她们一起做那些美术手工作业，无法怒视她们将来的男友们，还有，不能送她们走过婚礼的红地毯。
接下来的几天夹杂着泪水、深夜倾诉、医生咨询、保险谈判、决心、希望和恐惧。我很快便下定决心要从以下三项中选择一个：失去年月，失去下肢，或者失去生命。
历经这一切之后，我一直认为我会好起来的。无论发生什么事，毕竟我曾度过一段完整的人生。我周游了世界各地，写了十本书。想及这些，我的心态便平和了下来。
我也认为琳达会好起来的。她会经历许多痛苦和不便，但最后，她会过上充满激情和快乐的生活。
但我始终放不下艾登和泰碧，她们的生活将会多么艰难啊。她们会想知道我曾经是怎样一个人吗？她们会想知道我的想法吗？她们会缺乏我的认可、管教及爱吗？
我的声音。
几天之后，当我们在科德角看望姻亲时，我在黎明来临前突然醒来，想到了一个能够为艾登和泰碧再现我的声音的方法。我开始列出六个男人的名字——他们是我在人生不同阶段里结交的朋友，从小时候一直到今天。他们最了解我，与我有共同的价值观，帮助塑造我、指引我，与我一起旅游过，一起学习过，与我同甘共苦过。
他们熟悉我的声音。
在那个早上，我开始写这封信。
我相信我的女儿们将来会有丰富多彩的生活。她们会有充满爱的家人，会有温馨的家庭。她们会上大学并环游世界各地。她们会相互扶持。但她们可能会没有我在身旁。她们可能会失去爸爸。
你能够帮忙做她们的爸爸吗？
你会聆听她们的心声吗？你会回答她们的问题吗？你会时不时带她们出去吃午饭吗？如果你在城里的话，会带她们去看足球比赛吗？你会无数次地看她们演示芭蕾舞步吗？等她们稍微长大一点了，你会满足一下她们，给她们买新鞋吗？或者给她们买一部新手机，或者其他那些我现在无法想象的小玩意？你会给她们建议吗？你会像我这样严厉吗？你会帮助她们解除危机吗？随着日子过去，你会偶尔邀请她们参加家庭聚会吗？你会把她们介绍给那些有可能帮助她们实现其中一个梦想的人吗？你会告诉她们我是怎么想的吗？你会告诉她们我有多为她们感到自豪吗？
你会充当我的声音吗？
在科德角的那个清晨，我躺在床上，凝望外面的巴泽兹湾，希望我没有因为哭泣颤抖而吵醒琳达。我对自己说，我会把这群男人称之为“父亲委员会”。
父亲委员会，六名成员。他们都十分忙碌，并有着各自的负担，但是他们作为一个整体，也许能够为我那可能失去父亲的女儿们充当父亲的角色。
当然，我希望自己会完全康复，在将来能够一起参与许多家庭聚会。但我希望不管结果如何，我的委员会都能够继续。我希望我的女儿们能够通过你们所有人来了解这个世界。我希望泰碧和艾登可以通过这个委员会来了解我。
我想她们通过这个父亲委员会来认识她们自己。
我明白这个请求会成为一种负担，但这不是要你们投入无尽时间、资源和感情的不情之请。你们偶尔的几句话、几个手势、为她们敞开的大门以及一个欢迎的拥抱便能够使你们成为这些女孩子生活中的导师。
你们的声音会与我的声音融为一体。
即使写这封信——以及去思考这些问题，是这么地折磨人——但在我们人生的这个时刻出现的这一出人意料的想法确实给我和琳达带来了极大的力量和安慰。知道我们的女儿将会从你们身上学到过去那些年来你们教给我的一些有价值的经验，我们感到很高兴。我们很兴奋，在接下来的日子里我们全部都有“借口”去保持更紧密的联系。很荣幸我们家能有你们给予的慈父般的指引。
而最重要的是，我们知道，如有需要，这个“父亲委员会”可以代替我履行父亲的职责。
爱你的，
布鲁斯
小资料
“代理父亲”各有所长
“旅游父亲”杰夫·夏姆林：50岁的杰夫是一家旅游公司的老板，他和布鲁斯早在1983年就认识了，和布鲁斯一样都爱好旅游。
“爱心父亲”马克斯·斯蒂尔：45岁的马克斯是一家非赢利青少年服务公司的负责人，是布鲁斯就读耶鲁大学时的同学兼室友。马克斯称，他会将她们父亲在大学时代的各种传奇故事告诉她们。
“时尚父亲”戴维·布莱克：51岁文学代理商戴维喜欢任何现代时尚的东西。戴维称，他将来会尽力帮助这对女孩实现她们的人生梦想。
“老朋友父亲”本·爱德华兹：46岁的骨骼放射学家本和布鲁斯是童年好友。本经常带这对孪生女童到他和布鲁斯小时候常去的一条运河边游玩，并告诉她们自己当年曾和她们的父亲一起在这儿捉蝌蚪。
“创造力父亲”约苏华·拉莫：42岁的商业顾问和特技飞行员约苏华称，他会教这对双胞胎背莎士比亚的十四行诗，教她们欣赏奥地利作曲家马勒的交响乐，告诉她们如何才能在生活中发现美。
“询问者父亲”本·谢沃德：47岁的电视制片人、艾美奖获奖者本·谢沃德称，他会教这对双胞胎如何追寻人生真理，追求美好的事物。
“父亲委员会”的六名成员已经和他们的“新孪生女儿”打成一片，艾登和泰碧非常高兴能有这么多有趣的成年朋友陪她们一起玩。布鲁斯说：“杰夫曾带孩子们坐过拖拉机，本则带孩子们去钓过鱼，戴维和孩子们一起烘烤过面包。他们不仅是我的朋友，他们现在也成了她们的朋友。”
因篇幅所限，这里仅选摘了该书的第一章——布鲁斯写给他那六位好友的一封信。据布鲁斯在访谈中透露，写好这封信之后，他逐一来到好友的家里，亲自读给对方听。这封情感真挚、饱含深沉父爱的“代理父亲招聘信”深深感动了那些好友们，他们全都含泪答应了布鲁斯的请求，于是“父亲委员会”得以成立。值得一提的是，尽管这个“父亲委员会”最终没能派上用场——在强大的父爱驱使下，布鲁斯努力配合治疗，用乐观的心态打破了医生的“死亡预言”，奇迹般地存活了下来——但它却会一直存在。
Bruce Feiler（布鲁斯·费勒，1964— ），生于乔治亚州的美籍犹太人，是美国颇有影响力的作家。居住在纽约的他兴趣广泛，极具冒险精神，曾跋涉一万多英里游历圣经遗迹，并据此创作出畅销一时的Walking the Bible（《圣地踪迹》）一书。该书还被拍摄成美国公共电视台的热门系列片。布鲁斯自幼接受正统的犹太教育，获得耶鲁大学学士、剑桥大学国际关系学硕士学位，其研究触角涉及宗教、日本文化、马戏团、乡村音乐等多个领域。他喜爱旅游，足迹遍布五大洲六十余国。
——Maisie
Dear—,
As you know, I have learned that I have a seven-inch cancerous 1)tumor in my left 2)femur. The afternoon I first heard the diagnosis I was standing on York Avenue in Manhattan. I sat on a 3)stoop, telephoned Linda, called my parents, and wept. I went to get some 4)crutches, stumbled home, lay down on my bed, and stared at the sky for several hours imagining all the ways my life would change.
Then Eden and Tybee came in, running and giggling and looking in the mirror. They began to do this dance they made up when they turned three a few months ago. Mixing 5)ring-around-the-rosy, ballet, and the 6)hokey-pokey, they twirled frantically in a circle, going faster and faster until they 7)tumbled onto the ground, laughing with all the glee in the world. As I watched them, I couldn’t control myself. I 8)crumbled. I kept imagining all the walks I might not take with them, the ballet 9)recitals I might not see, the art projects I might not 10)mess up, the boyfriends I might not 11)scowl at, the aisles I might not walk down.
The next few days were a 12)tangle of tears and late-night conversations, doctor consultations, insurance negotiations, determination, hopes, and fears. I quickly determined I was looking at one of three options: The lost year, the lost limb, or the lost life.
Through it all, I kept thinking I would be fine. Whatever happens, I have lived a full life. I have traveled the world. I have written ten books. I am at peace.
I also thought Linda would be fine. She would experience a lot of pain and inconvenience, but in the end she would find a way to live a life of passion and joy.
But I kept coming back to Eden and Tybee and how difficult life might be for them. Would they wonder who I was? Would they wonder what I thought? Would they lack for my approval, my discipline, my love?
My voice.
A few days later, while we were visiting my 13)in-laws on 14)Cape Cod, I woke up suddenly before dawn and thought of a way I might help recreate my voice for them. I started making a list of six men—from all parts of my life, beginning when I was a child and stretching through today. These are the men who know me best. The men who share my values. The men who helped shape and guide me. The men who traveled with me, studied with me, have been through pain and happiness with me.
Men who know my voice.
That morning I began 15)composing this letter.
I believe my daughters will have plenty of resources in their lives. They’ll have loving families. They’ll have welcoming homes. They’ll be able to go to college and travel the world. They’ll have each other. But they may not have me. They may not have their dad.
Will you help be their dad?
Will you listen in on them? Will you answer their questions? Will you take them out to lunch every now and then? Will you go to a soccer game if you’re in town? Will you watch their ballet16)moves for the 17)umpteenth time? When they get older, will you 18)indulge them in a new pair of shoes? Or buy them a new cell phone, or some other 19)gadget I can’t even imagine right now? Will you give them advice? Will you be tough as I would be? Will you help them out in a crisis? And as time passes, will you invite them to a family gathering on occasion? Will you introduce them to somebody who might help one of their dreams come true? Will you tell them what I would be thinking? Will you tell them how proud I would be?
Will you be my voice?
And as I lay on my bed that morning on Cape Cod, staring out at 20)Buzzards Bay, and hoping I didn’t wake Linda as I shook with tears, I said to myself that I would call this group of men, “The Council of Dads.”
The Council of Dads. Six men. All very busy and burdened with their own challenges, but together, collectively, they might help 21)father my potentially fatherless daughters.
Naturally I hope that I will fully recover from my illness and that we will all be able to enjoy many family occasions together in the future. But I would like my Council to continue no matter the outcome. I would like my daughters to know the world through all of you. I would like Tybee and Eden to know me through this group.
I would like them to know themselves through their Council of Dads.
I understand this request might come as something of a burden. It is not intended to be an overwhelming commitment of time, resources, or emotion. A few words, a few gestures, an open door, a welcome embrace every now and then will ensure that your presence will be a constant guide in the girls’ lives.
Your voice will merge with mine.
Even though it has been painful to write—and to 22)contemplate—this unexpected idea at this moment in our lives has brought great strength and comfort to Linda and me. We are pleased to know that our girls will learn from you some of the valuable lessons you have taught me over the years. We are 23)thrilled that we all have an excuse to keep more closely in touch in the seasons to come. And we are honored to add your fatherly counsel into the heart of our family.
And above all, we know that this assembly of 24)surrogate dads can, if needed, be me.
Love,
Bruce
亲爱的——，
如你所知，我已得知我左边股骨上长了一个七英寸大小的肿瘤。初次听到这个诊断结果的那个下午，我正站在曼哈顿的约克大街上。我在街旁的台阶坐下，给琳达打电话，又打给了我的父母，然后哭泣不止。我找了些东西充当拐杖，踉踉跄跄地走回家，躺在床上，连续几个小时盯着天空，想象着我的生活可能会产生的方方面面的变化。
正在这时，艾登和泰碧进来了，一边跑，一边看着镜子咯咯地笑。她们准备开始跳她们几个月前刚满三岁时自己编排的舞蹈。里面混合了《玫瑰圈圈舞》、芭蕾舞和hokey-pokey摇摆舞，她们疯狂地转圈，越转越快，直到跌倒在地面上，大笑着，用尽了世上所有的欢乐。 看着她们，我难以自控，我崩溃了。我禁不住去想象着：以后不能再和她们一起去散步，不能看她们参加芭蕾舞表演，无法掺和跟她们一起做那些美术手工作业，无法怒视她们将来的男友们，还有，不能送她们走过婚礼的红地毯。
接下来的几天夹杂着泪水、深夜倾诉、医生咨询、保险谈判、决心、希望和恐惧。我很快便下定决心要从以下三项中选择一个：失去年月，失去下肢，或者失去生命。
历经这一切之后，我一直认为我会好起来的。无论发生什么事，毕竟我曾度过一段完整的人生。我周游了世界各地，写了十本书。想及这些，我的心态便平和了下来。
我也认为琳达会好起来的。她会经历许多痛苦和不便，但最后，她会过上充满激情和快乐的生活。
但我始终放不下艾登和泰碧，她们的生活将会多么艰难啊。她们会想知道我曾经是怎样一个人吗？她们会想知道我的想法吗？她们会缺乏我的认可、管教及爱吗？
我的声音。
几天之后，当我们在科德角看望姻亲时，我在黎明来临前突然醒来，想到了一个能够为艾登和泰碧再现我的声音的方法。我开始列出六个男人的名字——他们是我在人生不同阶段里结交的朋友，从小时候一直到今天。他们最了解我，与我有共同的价值观，帮助塑造我、指引我，与我一起旅游过，一起学习过，与我同甘共苦过。
他们熟悉我的声音。
在那个早上，我开始写这封信。
我相信我的女儿们将来会有丰富多彩的生活。她们会有充满爱的家人，会有温馨的家庭。她们会上大学并环游世界各地。她们会相互扶持。但她们可能会没有我在身旁。她们可能会失去爸爸。
你能够帮忙做她们的爸爸吗？
你会聆听她们的心声吗？你会回答她们的问题吗？你会时不时带她们出去吃午饭吗？如果你在城里的话，会带她们去看足球比赛吗？你会无数次地看她们演示芭蕾舞步吗？等她们稍微长大一点了，你会满足一下她们，给她们买新鞋吗？或者给她们买一部新手机，或者其他那些我现在无法想象的小玩意？你会给她们建议吗？你会像我这样严厉吗？你会帮助她们解除危机吗？随着日子过去，你会偶尔邀请她们参加家庭聚会吗？你会把她们介绍给那些有可能帮助她们实现其中一个梦想的人吗？你会告诉她们我是怎么想的吗？你会告诉她们我有多为她们感到自豪吗？
你会充当我的声音吗？
在科德角的那个清晨，我躺在床上，凝望外面的巴泽兹湾，希望我没有因为哭泣颤抖而吵醒琳达。我对自己说，我会把这群男人称之为“父亲委员会”。
父亲委员会，六名成员。他们都十分忙碌，并有着各自的负担，但是他们作为一个整体，也许能够为我那可能失去父亲的女儿们充当父亲的角色。
当然，我希望自己会完全康复，在将来能够一起参与许多家庭聚会。但我希望不管结果如何，我的委员会都能够继续。我希望我的女儿们能够通过你们所有人来了解这个世界。我希望泰碧和艾登可以通过这个委员会来了解我。
我想她们通过这个父亲委员会来认识她们自己。
我明白这个请求会成为一种负担，但这不是要你们投入无尽时间、资源和感情的不情之请。你们偶尔的几句话、几个手势、为她们敞开的大门以及一个欢迎的拥抱便能够使你们成为这些女孩子生活中的导师。
你们的声音会与我的声音融为一体。
即使写这封信——以及去思考这些问题，是这么地折磨人——但在我们人生的这个时刻出现的这一出人意料的想法确实给我和琳达带来了极大的力量和安慰。知道我们的女儿将会从你们身上学到过去那些年来你们教给我的一些有价值的经验，我们感到很高兴。我们很兴奋，在接下来的日子里我们全部都有“借口”去保持更紧密的联系。很荣幸我们家能有你们给予的慈父般的指引。
而最重要的是，我们知道，如有需要，这个“父亲委员会”可以代替我履行父亲的职责。
爱你的，
布鲁斯
小资料
“代理父亲”各有所长
“旅游父亲”杰夫·夏姆林：50岁的杰夫是一家旅游公司的老板，他和布鲁斯早在1983年就认识了，和布鲁斯一样都爱好旅游。
“爱心父亲”马克斯·斯蒂尔：45岁的马克斯是一家非赢利青少年服务公司的负责人，是布鲁斯就读耶鲁大学时的同学兼室友。马克斯称，他会将她们父亲在大学时代的各种传奇故事告诉她们。
“时尚父亲”戴维·布莱克：51岁文学代理商戴维喜欢任何现代时尚的东西。戴维称，他将来会尽力帮助这对女孩实现她们的人生梦想。
“老朋友父亲”本·爱德华兹：46岁的骨骼放射学家本和布鲁斯是童年好友。本经常带这对孪生女童到他和布鲁斯小时候常去的一条运河边游玩，并告诉她们自己当年曾和她们的父亲一起在这儿捉蝌蚪。
“创造力父亲”约苏华·拉莫：42岁的商业顾问和特技飞行员约苏华称，他会教这对双胞胎背莎士比亚的十四行诗，教她们欣赏奥地利作曲家马勒的交响乐，告诉她们如何才能在生活中发现美。
“询问者父亲”本·谢沃德：47岁的电视制片人、艾美奖获奖者本·谢沃德称，他会教这对双胞胎如何追寻人生真理，追求美好的事物。
“父亲委员会”的六名成员已经和他们的“新孪生女儿”打成一片，艾登和泰碧非常高兴能有这么多有趣的成年朋友陪她们一起玩。布鲁斯说：“杰夫曾带孩子们坐过拖拉机，本则带孩子们去钓过鱼，戴维和孩子们一起烘烤过面包。他们不仅是我的朋友，他们现在也成了她们的朋友。”