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结婚付出的代价
A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?
The father replied: I don’t know, son. I ’m still paying!
一个小男孩问他的爸爸: 结婚要花多少钱?
爸爸说: 我不知道,因为我仍然在付帐。
重大事件
Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?
Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.
Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in
1812?
Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.
老师: 1809年发生了什么重大事件?
小威利: 亚伯拉罕·林肯诞生。
老师: 正确。那么1812年发生了什么重要事件呢?
小威利: 亚伯拉罕·林肯过他的三周岁生日。
长寿秘诀
A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
“I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she says. “What’s your secret for a long, happy life?”
“I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise.”
“Wow, that’s amazing,” says the woman. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-six.”
一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。
“我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,” 那女士说。“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”
“我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼。”
“哦,真神奇,”女士说。“你高寿?”
“二十六。”
答问技巧
An Ogden, Iowa, a minister was matching coins with a member of his congregation for a cup of coffee. When asked if that didn’t constitute gambling, the minister replied, “It’s merely a scientific method of determining just who is going to commit an act of charity.”
Philosopher Bertrand Russell, asked if he was willing to die for his beliers, replied: “Of course not. After all, I may be wrong.”
A newspaper organized a contest for the best answer to the question: “If a fire broke out in the Louvre, and if you could only save one painting, which one would you carry out?”
The winning reply was: “The one nearest the exit.”
衣阿华州奥格登的一位牧师正在与一位教友为一杯咖啡而猜硬币。别人问他那是否构成赌博行为时,牧师答道:“这仅仅是决定由谁来做一件善事的一种科学方法。”
当有人问哲学家罗素是否愿意为了他的信仰而献身时,他答道:“当然不会。毕竟,我可能会是错的。”
一份报纸组织了一场竞赛,为下面的问题征集最佳答案:“如果卢浮宫起了火,而你只能救出一幅画,你将救出哪一幅?”
获奖的答案是:“最靠近门口的那一幅。”
A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?
The father replied: I don’t know, son. I ’m still paying!
一个小男孩问他的爸爸: 结婚要花多少钱?
爸爸说: 我不知道,因为我仍然在付帐。
重大事件
Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?
Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.
Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in
1812?
Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.
老师: 1809年发生了什么重大事件?
小威利: 亚伯拉罕·林肯诞生。
老师: 正确。那么1812年发生了什么重要事件呢?
小威利: 亚伯拉罕·林肯过他的三周岁生日。
长寿秘诀
A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.
“I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she says. “What’s your secret for a long, happy life?”
“I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise.”
“Wow, that’s amazing,” says the woman. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-six.”
一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。
“我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,” 那女士说。“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”
“我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼。”
“哦,真神奇,”女士说。“你高寿?”
“二十六。”
答问技巧
An Ogden, Iowa, a minister was matching coins with a member of his congregation for a cup of coffee. When asked if that didn’t constitute gambling, the minister replied, “It’s merely a scientific method of determining just who is going to commit an act of charity.”
Philosopher Bertrand Russell, asked if he was willing to die for his beliers, replied: “Of course not. After all, I may be wrong.”
A newspaper organized a contest for the best answer to the question: “If a fire broke out in the Louvre, and if you could only save one painting, which one would you carry out?”
The winning reply was: “The one nearest the exit.”
衣阿华州奥格登的一位牧师正在与一位教友为一杯咖啡而猜硬币。别人问他那是否构成赌博行为时,牧师答道:“这仅仅是决定由谁来做一件善事的一种科学方法。”
当有人问哲学家罗素是否愿意为了他的信仰而献身时,他答道:“当然不会。毕竟,我可能会是错的。”
一份报纸组织了一场竞赛,为下面的问题征集最佳答案:“如果卢浮宫起了火,而你只能救出一幅画,你将救出哪一幅?”
获奖的答案是:“最靠近门口的那一幅。”