论文部分内容阅读
In March 2007， I was recovering from major surgery for breast cancer and going through a divorce. It was a terrible time， and I was spending most of my days at home keeping everything to myself. Then my Today Show colleague Matt Lauer threw me a lifeline by asking whether I felt well enough to tape a “Where in the World？” segment.
“Why don’t you pick a couple of days and go to Ireland and escape？” he suggested kindly. I thought it would be a great way to forget about it all， so I jumped at the chance.
The trip was fun because I was living in the moment， but by the time I got on the plane to go home， I wasn’t feeling well. My plan was to curl up in a ball and sleep for the entire flight. I had my earbuds in my hand； they were an inch away from going in when the guy next to me turned to me and said， “Hi. Howya doin’？”
I thought， Oh no.
Then he said， “I recognize you from somewhere.”
“I work on the Today Show，” I told him， still holding my earbuds.
He smiled at me. “How’s Matt？ Is Matt nice？”
“Yeah，” I said. “Matt’s nice.”
“How’s Al？ Al seems funny.”
All I wanted to do was sleep， but he had kind eyes and looked like a good-hearted guy. So we continued making small talk.
Then he noticed I was wearing a compression sleeve on my arm and asked， “What is that？”
I told him I’d had a “procedure” and needed the sleeve to fly， hoping we could change the subject.
But he continued， “What procedure did you have？”
“I had an operation，” I said 1）vaguely. He was still curious， so I finally said， “I had breast cancer. But， boy， I hope that’s not the first thing you think of when you get off this flight， telling your kids， ‘Hey， I sat next to this girl with breast cancer.’？”
He paused for a moment and then said， “What’s wrong with that？ Breast cancer is part of you， like going to college or getting married.”
I could feel my eyes filling up.
“Let me give you some advice： Don’t 2）hog your journey. It’s not just for you，” he said. “Think of how many people you could help.”
I had tears coming down my face， and I said to him， “I can’t believe I’m crying in front of you. I don’t even know you.”
“Look， you have a choice in life，” he said. “You can either put your stuff deep in your pockets and take it to your grave， or you can help someone.”
Even though I’m on a show where we’re pretty open， I was really struggling then. I’ve always been a very private person， and aside from the few people who needed to know， I’d kept my illness secret. I didn’t want to be defined by my weakness.
But this man， whose name was Ken Duane， showed me that my illness gave me strength—because it gave me the ability to lighten someone else’s load. I decided at that moment that I was going to share my story publicly. Later that year， I talked about my illness and my conversation with Ken on air with 3）Ann Curry.
Years later， a producer who used to work on our show mentioned that her boyfriend was in charge of an event， and she thought I knew the 4）honoree. It was Ken.
He and I hadn’t seen each other since we’d met on the plane， but Ken’s best friend 5）wound up contacting me and asking me to help present Ken with a Father of the Year award at a luncheon in New York. Ken was sitting there grinning as I said， “He’s touched a lot of people’s lives. He obviously touched a stranger like me.”
Everything 6）came full circle a few years ago when he was diagnosed with 7）prostate cancer. He called me and said he now understood what it felt like. I told him it seemed as if he’d always understood： It’s better to share and heal than to try to hide away.
He is healthy now， and I am forever grateful that I never got that trans atlantic nap.
2007年3月，我正处于乳癌手术的恢复期，同时在办理离婚。那是段糟糕的日子，大多数时间我都呆在家里，一个人扛着所有事情。然后，我主持的《今日秀》节目的同事马特·劳厄尔给我扔了一条救生索——他问我的状态能否录一档名为《究竟在哪里？》的节目。
“你何不抽出几天时间去爱尔兰，逃离这一切？”他友善地建议道。我想这会是一个能让我把这一切抛诸脑后的好方法，所以我抓住了这个机会。
那次旅程很有趣，因为我尽情享受了每一分每一秒，但是当我登上回程的飞机时，我有点儿不舒服。我打算蜷成一团，在睡梦中度过这次飞行。我双手拿着耳塞，在它们距离我耳朵仅有一英寸时，坐在我旁边的那个家伙转向我，对我说：“嗨，你好吗？”
我想，天，不要。
然后他说：“我在哪里见过你。”
“我在《今日秀》节目组里工作，”我对他说，依然拿着我的耳塞。
他对我投以微笑。“马特怎么样？他人好吗？”
“挺好的”我说。“马特人挺好的。”
“那厄尔怎么样？厄尔看起来很有趣。”
我只想睡觉，但是他眼里流露着善意，看着像个心地善良的人。所以我们继续闲聊着。
然后他注意到我手臂上戴着压缩护臂袖套，问道：“那是什么？”
我告诉他我做了一个“手术”，坐飞机时需要戴着这个，我希望我们能换个话题。
但他继续问道：“什么手术？”
“我开了刀，”我模棱两可地说道。他还是表现出好奇，所以我最后终于说了出来：“我做了乳癌手术。但是，小子，我希望你下飞机后不要想着第一时间告诉你的朋友，‘嘿，我旁边坐了个患乳癌的女生。’”
他停顿了一会儿，然后说道：“那又怎样？乳癌是你人生的一部分，就像上大学或者结婚一样。”
我感到热泪盈眶。
“让我给你点建议吧：不要独占你的旅程。它不仅仅属于你，”他说。“想想你能帮到多少人。”
我的眼泪划过脸庞，我对他说：“真不敢相信我居然在你面前哭。我甚至都不知道你是谁。”
“听着，你的人生正面临着一个选择，”他说。“你可以选择把你的事深藏在口袋里，然后带进坟墓，你也可以选择帮助别人。”
尽管我做的节目作风很开放，但我当时真的很挣扎。我一直是个很注重隐私的人，除了少数需要知道这件事的人外，我的病情一直是对外保密的。我不想让我的弱点成为我的标签。
但这个叫肯·杜安的男人让我知道，我的疾病可以给予我力量——因为它给了我减轻他人负担的能力。那一刻，我决定要向公众分享我的故事。后来，就在那一年，我和安·科里在节目上说出了我的病情，分享了我与肯的对话。
几年后，我们节目的一个前任制片人提到她男朋友在办一场活动，她觉得我认识那个获奖人。那就是肯。
我们在飞机相遇后就再也没见过彼此了，但最终肯最好的朋友联系到我，并邀请我到纽约的一场午宴担任颁奖嘉宾，给肯颁发“年度之父”奖。我说道，“他影响了很多人的人生，显然也影响了我这个陌生人的人生。”肯坐在那露齿而笑。
几年前，一切重演了，他被诊断出患有前列腺癌。他打电话来跟我说，他现在明白那是什么感觉了。一如他始终明白的那样，我对他说：与人分享，寻求治愈总比试图隐藏要好。
他现在很健康，我永远感激我没有在睡眠中度过那次越洋飞行。
“Why don’t you pick a couple of days and go to Ireland and escape？” he suggested kindly. I thought it would be a great way to forget about it all， so I jumped at the chance.
The trip was fun because I was living in the moment， but by the time I got on the plane to go home， I wasn’t feeling well. My plan was to curl up in a ball and sleep for the entire flight. I had my earbuds in my hand； they were an inch away from going in when the guy next to me turned to me and said， “Hi. Howya doin’？”
I thought， Oh no.
Then he said， “I recognize you from somewhere.”
“I work on the Today Show，” I told him， still holding my earbuds.
He smiled at me. “How’s Matt？ Is Matt nice？”
“Yeah，” I said. “Matt’s nice.”
“How’s Al？ Al seems funny.”
All I wanted to do was sleep， but he had kind eyes and looked like a good-hearted guy. So we continued making small talk.
Then he noticed I was wearing a compression sleeve on my arm and asked， “What is that？”
I told him I’d had a “procedure” and needed the sleeve to fly， hoping we could change the subject.
But he continued， “What procedure did you have？”
“I had an operation，” I said 1）vaguely. He was still curious， so I finally said， “I had breast cancer. But， boy， I hope that’s not the first thing you think of when you get off this flight， telling your kids， ‘Hey， I sat next to this girl with breast cancer.’？”
He paused for a moment and then said， “What’s wrong with that？ Breast cancer is part of you， like going to college or getting married.”
I could feel my eyes filling up.
“Let me give you some advice： Don’t 2）hog your journey. It’s not just for you，” he said. “Think of how many people you could help.”
I had tears coming down my face， and I said to him， “I can’t believe I’m crying in front of you. I don’t even know you.”
“Look， you have a choice in life，” he said. “You can either put your stuff deep in your pockets and take it to your grave， or you can help someone.”
Even though I’m on a show where we’re pretty open， I was really struggling then. I’ve always been a very private person， and aside from the few people who needed to know， I’d kept my illness secret. I didn’t want to be defined by my weakness.
But this man， whose name was Ken Duane， showed me that my illness gave me strength—because it gave me the ability to lighten someone else’s load. I decided at that moment that I was going to share my story publicly. Later that year， I talked about my illness and my conversation with Ken on air with 3）Ann Curry.
Years later， a producer who used to work on our show mentioned that her boyfriend was in charge of an event， and she thought I knew the 4）honoree. It was Ken.
He and I hadn’t seen each other since we’d met on the plane， but Ken’s best friend 5）wound up contacting me and asking me to help present Ken with a Father of the Year award at a luncheon in New York. Ken was sitting there grinning as I said， “He’s touched a lot of people’s lives. He obviously touched a stranger like me.”
Everything 6）came full circle a few years ago when he was diagnosed with 7）prostate cancer. He called me and said he now understood what it felt like. I told him it seemed as if he’d always understood： It’s better to share and heal than to try to hide away.
He is healthy now， and I am forever grateful that I never got that trans atlantic nap.
2007年3月，我正处于乳癌手术的恢复期，同时在办理离婚。那是段糟糕的日子，大多数时间我都呆在家里，一个人扛着所有事情。然后，我主持的《今日秀》节目的同事马特·劳厄尔给我扔了一条救生索——他问我的状态能否录一档名为《究竟在哪里？》的节目。
“你何不抽出几天时间去爱尔兰，逃离这一切？”他友善地建议道。我想这会是一个能让我把这一切抛诸脑后的好方法，所以我抓住了这个机会。
那次旅程很有趣，因为我尽情享受了每一分每一秒，但是当我登上回程的飞机时，我有点儿不舒服。我打算蜷成一团，在睡梦中度过这次飞行。我双手拿着耳塞，在它们距离我耳朵仅有一英寸时，坐在我旁边的那个家伙转向我，对我说：“嗨，你好吗？”
我想，天，不要。
然后他说：“我在哪里见过你。”
“我在《今日秀》节目组里工作，”我对他说，依然拿着我的耳塞。
他对我投以微笑。“马特怎么样？他人好吗？”
“挺好的”我说。“马特人挺好的。”
“那厄尔怎么样？厄尔看起来很有趣。”
我只想睡觉，但是他眼里流露着善意，看着像个心地善良的人。所以我们继续闲聊着。
然后他注意到我手臂上戴着压缩护臂袖套，问道：“那是什么？”
我告诉他我做了一个“手术”，坐飞机时需要戴着这个，我希望我们能换个话题。
但他继续问道：“什么手术？”
“我开了刀，”我模棱两可地说道。他还是表现出好奇，所以我最后终于说了出来：“我做了乳癌手术。但是，小子，我希望你下飞机后不要想着第一时间告诉你的朋友，‘嘿，我旁边坐了个患乳癌的女生。’”
他停顿了一会儿，然后说道：“那又怎样？乳癌是你人生的一部分，就像上大学或者结婚一样。”
我感到热泪盈眶。
“让我给你点建议吧：不要独占你的旅程。它不仅仅属于你，”他说。“想想你能帮到多少人。”
我的眼泪划过脸庞，我对他说：“真不敢相信我居然在你面前哭。我甚至都不知道你是谁。”
“听着，你的人生正面临着一个选择，”他说。“你可以选择把你的事深藏在口袋里，然后带进坟墓，你也可以选择帮助别人。”
尽管我做的节目作风很开放，但我当时真的很挣扎。我一直是个很注重隐私的人，除了少数需要知道这件事的人外，我的病情一直是对外保密的。我不想让我的弱点成为我的标签。
但这个叫肯·杜安的男人让我知道，我的疾病可以给予我力量——因为它给了我减轻他人负担的能力。那一刻，我决定要向公众分享我的故事。后来，就在那一年，我和安·科里在节目上说出了我的病情，分享了我与肯的对话。
几年后，我们节目的一个前任制片人提到她男朋友在办一场活动，她觉得我认识那个获奖人。那就是肯。
我们在飞机相遇后就再也没见过彼此了，但最终肯最好的朋友联系到我，并邀请我到纽约的一场午宴担任颁奖嘉宾，给肯颁发“年度之父”奖。我说道，“他影响了很多人的人生，显然也影响了我这个陌生人的人生。”肯坐在那露齿而笑。
几年前，一切重演了，他被诊断出患有前列腺癌。他打电话来跟我说，他现在明白那是什么感觉了。一如他始终明白的那样，我对他说：与人分享，寻求治愈总比试图隐藏要好。
他现在很健康，我永远感激我没有在睡眠中度过那次越洋飞行。