本稿以Brown&Levinson的Politeness为理论背景,比较中日两国对依赖的拒绝表现。通过对照比较的结果,日本人拒绝时进行两次以上的道歉维护对方的积极面子。而中国人包括日语学习者只进行一次道歉,只顾及自己的积极面子的倾向较明显。还有与先行文献相反的是,大多数的日本人认为对长辈表达暧昧的拒绝是一种失礼的行为,因此明确说出结论拒绝长辈的日本人要比中国人多。另外还发现日语学习者在表示同感和缓和关系的表达中有发生误用的倾向。 Based on Brown & Levinson’s Politeness theory, this article compares the refusal performance of China and Japan on dependence. By comparing the results of the comparison, the Japanese refused to make more than two apologies to defend each other’s positive face. Chinese people, including Japanese learners, only made one apology, and their tendency to take their own positive face was obvious. And, contrary to the prior literature, most Japanese believe the vague rejection of elders is an act of rudeness, so it is clear that the Japanese who conclude that they reject their elders are far more Chinese. In addition, Japanese learners were also found to be prone to misuse in expressing their sympathy and ease of relationship.